


You're My Smile

by Boketto__Boketto



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Canon Gay Relationship, Child, Creepy, Family, Family Drama, Family Feels, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-08 13:04:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11647140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boketto__Boketto/pseuds/Boketto__Boketto
Summary: Cecil lives happily in his relationship with his one true love Carlos, but as their life unfolds, Cecil finds himself longing for something more. Will his new desire break apart his relationship or will it bring them closer together?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> These characters and the world of Nightvale belong to Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor.

It was so dark.

Usually, Carlos left a lamp on somewhere in the house. He knew that Cecil was terrified of the dark so he always took it upon himself to make sure his husband was extra comfortable. Today, Carlos must have been working late in the lab because nobody was there to turn on a light when the apartment got a little bit too dark for comfort. 

Cecil came back to a pitch black home and almost passed out from the instant fear that welled up inside of him. It wasn't often that he came home to an empty house. Both of the residents worked late into the night but Carlos was always home before Cecil. He cooked dinner, turned on the lights and made the room glow. But when Carlos wasn't home first, Cecil had to face his fears. 

Cecil ran into the darkness of the home and turned on the nearest light. He sat down right next to the lamp and held his knees fearfully. He tried not to look into the dark bedroom or bathroom on either side of him. 

Whenever it was dark, the radio host could hear these whispers. Whispers telling him to do bad things, Cecil didn't know what kinds of things were lurking in the night, telling him to do unspeakable actions, so he preferred just to keep the lights on. When he was bathed in the glow of a lamp, the voices went away and he was able to think again. 

Cecil say in his circle of safe light for hours. By the time Carlos got home, it was past midnight. Cecil was still dressed in his black slacks, purple vest, and gray dress shirt. He hadn't even taken off his shiny loafers.

Carlos wasn't surprised to see his husband in a panicked state on the floor. He felt bad. But he couldn't have left the lab any earlier. He went around the apartment, flipping on every light he could. He gently went and shook Cecil from his fitful slumber. 

The radio host looked up at the scientist quietly. He stood after a few seconds.

The last thing Carlos wanted to do after Cecil went through such a bad night alone was scold his husband, but that's what he had to do. 

"You can't shut down every time I'm not here to turn on the lights." Carlos gingerly unbuttoned Cecil's vest for him. Cecil's clothes were all wrinkled and they looked as tired and distressed as he did. 

Cecil didn't respond. He hadn't told his husband about the kinds of things he hears in the dark. He hadn't told him because he was scared that it would frighten his true love away. 

After a few seconds of silence and a stern look from Carlos, Cecil finally blurted out, "You can't leave me alone here, Carlos!"

Carlos crossed his arms. "I can't? I have a life Cecil," he informed him as if Cecil were a child. "I can't drop everything to take care of you. It's not fair."

Cecil didn't know what to say. His words weren't forming sentences. He stuttered for a few minutes. He wanted to tell Carlos why he hated being alone, but he was too scared to do so. He closed his mouth and silently walked to the bedroom. He hated fighting with Carlos. It made his head hurt. It made his heart hurt. It made his everything hurt. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These characters and the world of Nightvale belong to Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor.

"Now for the news," Cecil cooed into his studio microphone with his rich voice. Normally, speaking to his audience of devoted listeners filled Cecil with joy, but today, he just felt bored. Maybe even a little bit melancholy. 

Cecil hadn't heard an apology from Carlos yet. The scientist had left for the lab early; before Cecil even woke up. The only times Cecil was greeted with an empty bed in the morning was when Carlos was mad with him, or if something catastrophic to Nightvale's future was going down. Cecil sincerely hoped that the latter was the case. However, he knew how unlikely that was. If something bad were happening anywhere in town, Cecil would be reporting on it. And today's news was the most boring segment of the day. The traffic report, of all things, was more interesting (and all that was happening on the roads today was that the freshly-laid tar was devouring unlucky motorists).

The radio host flipped through the news reports, hoping for something to indicate that Carlos had left early for a reason other than he was mad at his husband. Cecil pouted as he finished reciting the report. There was nothing that warranted Carlos leaving.

After determining that the love of his life was, indeed, angry with him, Cecil didn't want to even finish his radio show. His head throbbed like it always did when he was upset. Cecil felt like kicking something. He was angry with himself for being such a needy wimp.

Cecil cut his broadcast short. He could hear Station Management screech out in what the radio host assumed was anger. Cecil ignored it. His head felt like it was going to explode. 

Before Station Management could have the chance to do whatever horrible things they do to people who don't follow the rules of the station to Cecil, the radio host was out the door and halfway to Carlos' lab. He couldn't stay mad forever and Cecil was going to make sure that his husband stopped being mad today. 

Cecil burst into the lab and grabbed Carlos' shoulder. He was in the middle of something that looked important but Cecil didn't care. 

Carlos yelled, "Hey!" When he got outside and saw that the forceful man dragging him from his work was his husband, his face hardened. "Are you serious, Cecil!?" He shouted, "I'm at work! What is wrong with you!?"

The radio host responded, much calmer than his counterpart, "Don't yell at me." He crossed his arms, "I can't be alone because when I am, especially in the dark, these voices tell me to do bad things. I don't like thinking about hurting people so I don't like being alone..." He became very interested in his loafers and fought back a waterfall of tears from escaping his lavender eyes. "The voices tell me to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you."

Carlos' face went pale (at least as pale as his beautiful, sun kissed tan could allow). The look on the scientist's face was exactly the reaction that Cecil was afraid of. 

Carlos didn't look look up at Cecil. "What do these... voices tell you to do?" His voice had a quiver in it. It sounded afraid and cautious. Like it was trying to talk down an aggravated librarian. 

Cecil rested his hands in his slack pocket's. He already regretted this decision to tell his husband the truth behind his fear of being alone for too long. "They..." he paused. "They tell me to kill you."

Taking a step back, Carlos suddenly felt like a stranger to Cecil. The hurt on Carlos' face was thick and painful to Cecil.

The radio host reached out to stroke Carlos' face. "I'm sorry." It sounded desperate. "I love you." Now Cecil was grasping at flag poles. He was falling from a building and he was clawing at the air to stop himself from hitting the ground. 

The scientist flinched back from his husband's touch like it was searing hot. 

Rock bottom, Cecil thought, felt very cold. 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These characters and the world of Nightvale belong to Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor.

Cecil wasn't a drinker. He never had been. But when Carlos was mad at him, it was enough to make the radio host drown himself in some wine. The perfect person to help Cecil do just that was only a short walk away from Carlos' lab. 

After Carlos looked at Cecil with such horror, Cecil ran away from him. He didn't know what to do. Never had his husband ever looked at him in that way. 

Knocking on the front door of his nearest friend's home, Cecil started to cry. "Dana," he whimpered. "Please be home. I need a friend." The sound of his own needy voice made Cecil sick. This is what made Carlos mad at him in the first place and what lead him to ruining his marriage. 

Dana came to the door quickly and blinked in surprise at the blubbering mess of a radio host on her door step. "What happened?" Dana tucked a spiraled curl behind her ear, concern washing over her face. 

Without waiting for an invitation, Cecil slumped into Dana's home and collapsed onto her purple couch, sobs overtaking his entire body. His tears would stain the velvet upholstery. On any other day, Cecil would have cared about ruining such a beautiful couch, but now he didn't mind for such trivial things.

The mayor watched her friend practically cry out his lungs. "What happened?" She asked again. 

Cecil threw a hand over his forehead, sitting up in flamboyant fashion, a drama queen, even when absolutely devastated. "Carlos hates me now." He sounded thoroughly heart broken. "I need a drink. This day has been the worst."

Always a loyal friend, Dana brought Cecil a bottle of his favorite wine. She kept it just in case Cecil came over in a mood like this. "You're lucky I was home," she said comfortingly, wrapping a blanket around Cecil's shivering shoulders. "I got permission to take the day off from City Council."

"Thank you for letting me in, Dana." Cecil wiped his nose. "I suppose I better explain what is going on...?"

Dana nodded, "That would help me understand why you're currently crying your face off on my new couch." Her smile was so warm. Dana was the best friend Cecil had ever had- besides Old Woman Josie (bless her soul).

"I told him about the voices," Cecil admitted. He had told Dana about the things he heard when he is left alone in the dark. "And today, I was going to ask him about adopting a child of our own." Saying this sent Cecil into a whole knew fit of tears.

Dana's hand rubbed Cecil's back gently. "Telling him was the right thing to do."

"No!" Cecil covered his face. "You didn't see the way he looked at me!"

"I didn't. You're right. But I know Carlos. This will all sort itself out." Dana smiled. She always sounded so persuasive. Cecil didn't believe her one bit, but that Dana Cardinal was always so good at giving him hope. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of these characters and the world of Nightvale belong to Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor.

He could feel Carlos getting bored with all of this. Cecil was painfully aware of how long this whole adoption process was taking him and his husband. He never thought that it would take so long. 

It had been two months since the couple had resolved to adopt. Two long months of calling up orphanages. Whenever the two of them came around, it seemed like all of the children were either adopted already or else undesirable.

Carlos was at the end of his rope.

"We should stop this," Carlos muttered while straining pasta one sleepy Saturday. "It's taking too long. Clearly we weren't meant to have children."

His husband looked up from his book. "What?" He blinked in confusion. "It's not been two months. Some couples wait for years."

"Well I don't want to be one of those couples!" Carlos suddenly snapped at the radio host, slamming the colander down into their kitchen sink. He faced Cecil, taking off his glasses. "I don't want our relationship to be us, waiting for a child for years on end. All we've talked about for the last two months has been what orphanage or foster home to try next!" Carlos insisted, "It's time to stop this nonsense."

Cecil stared at his husband like he was a stranger. "Are you serious? This is what we want," he sighed his words, exasperated.

"This is what you want!" Carlos crossed his arms across his chest. His hair was in a ponytail, exposing the gray at his temples. Cecil noticed how much more silver there was in his husbands hair now. 

"You agreed to this!" Cecil retaliated.

"Because you're like a desperate little puppy!" Carlos shouted, "If I say no to you, you pout for days! I don't have the right to tell you no!"

Cecil's heart fell like it might fall out of his chest and shatter into pieces. He couldn't believe how little his husband was considering his feelings. The radio host held his own chest and clutched his tie. His eyes were growing teary. "Well," he whimpered, standing. "If that's how you feel, I guess me and my desperate self should just leave."

"You don't have to leave, Cecil." Carlos rubbed his eyes. He had never yelled at Cecil before. He might have gotten stern with him on occasion, but he'd never snapped at him so badly like this. 

Cecil wasn't listening. He already had his shoes on and was leaving out the front door. 


End file.
